Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with everything they have.
You seem distracted John. What’s wrong?
Oh, today is sort of a tough anniversary for me. When I was 14, my Dad left the family and I haven’t seen him since then. It was 20 years ago today.
I’m very sorry. That must be a hard thing to forgive.
I don’t know, the older I get the less I even know what that means. I’m still angry, and hurt, and filled with questions but those feelings don’t control me anymore. I hope he’s well, wherever he is. I guess maybe that’s forgiveness. Anyhow it’s all I have to offer.
Now that I’ve grown up a bit, I find myself relating to his memory as a man, not an aching child. I’ve made my own mistakes, and I’ve hurt people too. More and more I see him as just another flawed person, not the villain who destroyed my mom.
I don’t want to dwell in the past, I just want to do better for my kids. I’ll never leave them—I want to hold on to them for as long and as hard as I can.
That’s what she said.
How much of what I’ve said have you listened to?
I dunno, none-ish.